It's been a long time, I shouldn't have left you

Word on the street is our illustrious football coach caught himself a ticket at a speed trap in Arcade, Ga recently. I thought this might present itself with an inelegant segue into the tale of the first time I went to prison, due in fact to a speeding ticket.

On one of my occasional trips from Athens to Macon while I was an undergrad, I was pulled over doing 70-something in a 55 near the thriving metropolis of Eatonton. After I called and got paperwork on everything, I found out that I could either pay the $195 ticket or do 24 hours in jail. Being a college student at the time, I clearly thought it better to be locked up. Formalities were involved, as I was forced to wait for a certain time period to run out, and then drive to Eatonton and be booked there. When I arrived at the prison, I was told that it was good that I had come when I did, as they would have issued a warrant and come after me had I waited any longer. As I was being fingerprinted, one of the cops (deputies? I don't know) went to look for somebody high enough up on the chain of command to formally book me. I then was told to hose down in the shower and given my standard issue greens, (with bonus missing top button, Awesome!). A word of advice to any aspiring inmates: wear a plain white undershirt, with nothing on it, and you can keep it. Not so my faded white David Allan Coe tee. Actual jail was not bad on this occasion. I spent a little time playing chess with pieces carved from bars of soap, and a little more time watching others fight over watching wrestling or Monday Night Football. I had little fear of rape despite my inviting open collar and bare chest becase Eatonton's jail was not crowded, and I received a cell to myself for the night. Sure enough, about 11 AM the next day I was called to the door of the general population room and let out. The guys my age or near that were cops and wardens were cool enough about what I was doing, but the old guys who looked like they polished off a fifth of Evan an evening gave me the wholehearted bad cop Bull treatment. It was all in all not a terrible experience, though incredibly boring. Easily the best of the three times I have been locked up, and it sure beat paying $195.